Oscars 2010

Hands down, the ugliest Oscar babe from head to toe was Sarah Jessica Parker. The Chanel gown. "Little House On The Prairie" updo. And that ghastly makeup and fake tan. You can't see it from the photo but under the red carpet lights, the "Sex and The City" star's face was a horror with uneven bronzing makeup. Ugh.

Best Actress winner Sandra Bullock hit the red carpet with hot pink lipstick I thought looked awful.  By the time she hunkered down in her seat, her makeup wranglers had wiped off the pink and replaced it with a flattering red.  I cannot believe how much plastic surgery, Botox, spacklers, collagen lips, whatever, Bullock has had since her 1982 graduation from the same Arlington, Virginia high school that Warren Beatty and his sister Shirley MacLaine graduated from years earlier.

NBC's "30 Rock" Tina Fey looked okay.  Hate the hair.

I found it trite that when Kathryn Bigelow became th4e first woman to win for best director the orchestra struck up Helen Reddy's 1970s hit "I Am Woman."

Streisand's looking a little long in the tooth, no?

Behind the scenes Bigelow's ex-hub, "Avatar" director James Cameron, jokingly went for the jugular.

A half-mill in plastic surgery over, what?, the last 20 years preserves the nearly 50-year-old Demi Moore.

Why Charlize Theron would call attention to her flat chest with this ghastly gown is beyond me.

Geraldo Rivera was found hiding under Penelope Cruz's voluminous Donna Karan creation.

Kate Winslet looked amazing.

See all the fashion.

Aside:  What was with the presenters' microphones?  Viewers heard off-script comments before and after.

Why did gay actor Neil Patrick Harris insert this line in his opening song and dance routine:  "Why does the prisoner drop the soap? No one wants to do it alone..."

Oscar co-host Steve Martin was booed for a racial joke.  Another joke about a Toyota elicited gasps.  Nominee and avid toker Woody Harrelson was put on the spot when Martin and co-host Alec Baldwin speculated Woody was high.

Dead "Charlie's Angels" Farrah Fawcett and "Golden Girls" Bea Arthur were omitted from the list of 2009's dearly departed.  As you'll recall Farrah's death was upstaged by Michael Jackson's unexpected exit the next day.

Related:  Wash Post review  NYP's Linda Stasi reviews Baldwin and Martin. NYDN's David Hinckley on the Academy's focus on the red carpet. For the definitive review, LA Times' Mary McNamara "Oscars Show Has No Sense Of Timing."  NYT's Alessandra Stanley on the pair's "Catskills routine."