SNL's cold open: A fake Larry King interviewing a fake Jay Leno (Darrell Hammond)and a fake Conan O'Brien. Why not a fake Jeff Zucker? Oooh, cutting a bit too close to the bulletproof Golden Goose.
"Leno": "You know what NBC stands for? Nothing but catastrophe." The bit was as limp as Ross the Intern's wrist. Worth watching Jason Sudeikis as terminally Tourette's David Letterman.
"Larry King": "It seems like this is a very good solution here. Time machine."
What would Conan, Jay, Zucker & NBC do if they could turn back the hands of time to 2004 when Jay agreed to hand over the "Tonight" show gig to Conan?
Conan on Friday enlisted sidekick Andy Richter as "Let's Make A Deal" product showcase queen Carol Merrill. Conan set Andy up for the "Tonight Show Travel Gifts" eBay auction with a Conan carry-on bag that's suddenly become valuable now that Conan's rapidly approaching his expiration date.
Conan: "This bag is as impenetrable as an NBC executive's skull."
Andy notes the bag "moves easier than a talk show in a time slot."
Conan giggles: "One hundred percent of the proceeds go to bailout the Winter Olympics on NBC" which is already $200 mil in the hole. The pair laugh like Napoleon the Fourteenth in the once-banned song "They're Coming To Take Me Away! (ha ha, hee hee):
Ironically Zucker's fuck-up has boosted ratings for Conan and cellar-dweller Jay. Conan beat Letterman Friday. Conan's monologue ripped NBC and Jeff Zucker new assholes. "NBC has been calling me every name in the book. In fact they think I'm such an idiot that they now want me to run the network."
Of course O'Brien's ratings have gone up. Sort of like the crowd that gathers to look at a train wreck.
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ReplyDeleteThat's why I've been watching, and he's actually been funnier. Leno, on the other hand, has been less funny and is probably Zuck-fucked damaged goods now.
Leno will be making people laugh and whipping Letterman's ass long after Zucker is begging for comp tickets to SNL.
ReplyDeleteAl, you're right. Conan is funnier and looser. I can even tolerate his monologue now... Friday was priceless.
ReplyDeleteAn now Zucker will hide from the NBC Gala at the awards in Califorina. Lead, follow, or get out of the way.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't it be funny if we find out at the end of next week or after the Olympics that this who;e feud is BS, that Conan O'Brien keeps "The Tonight Show", and Leno's show changes to once or twice weekly?
ReplyDeleteIf Leno does take over his old show again, would celebrities calling themselves "Team Conan" appear?
I hear Schwartzenegger needs a new gig soon.
It WOULD be funny, Al. Funny ha ha...
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